The Not-Now Mom

I came across a devotional book for mom's that I'd bought a long time ago (well, ok. Maybe a year ago. But it seems like forever…); I'm A Good Mother: A Devotional Book For The not-so-perfect mom. It's been sitting on my bookshelf for that long. I think maybe I opened it once when I first bought it, then quickly shelved it and left it to gather dust. I don't know what got into me last night. I guess trying to read two other books and knit two projects at the same time just wasn't enough for me. So last night before bed (which is where and when I do most of my reading), I saved it from it's bitter fate of becoming a "Not-Read" book.

However, I must say that the title, for whatever reason, particularly appealed to me last night.

I already know I'm a not-so-perfect mom. This book was written for not-so-perfect moms. So maybe there would be some words of wisdom for me.

The devotionals are pretty short, but still I only managed to get through about ten pages before I closed it and placed it on top of the other books gracing my night table. But there was one devotional that got me to really thinking.

In a few short sentences Gigi Schweikert, the author, discussed how sometimes we, as mom's, get so caught up in the other things that need doing (laundry, dishes, cooking, car pooling, running errands) that we forget to stop and just enjoy our children in the moment. And when they ask for our attention, we often respond with, "not now", and send them off to wonder exactly when "now" will be.

The Not-Now Mom can be a sahm, just as much as she can be a working mom. After all, there are play groups and doctor appointments to get to during the day. Housework and grocery shopping. Cooking and then bathing.

It is quite possible to spend all day with your child and still be a Not-Now mom.

I know that first hand.

Because I am guilty of this. Very, very guilty of this.

Sure, I take the girls to playgroups and story times, as well as other various environments where they can play and be with other kids. But sometimes I just forget that they need an hour with me more than they need an hour with their newest friends at the mall playground. I know I need to have more positive interactions with them, rather than most of my interactions being for discipline. I see that very clearly right now.

I have a lot of work to do. On myself as a person, and myself as a mom. Perhaps perfecting one will enhance the other. I don't know.

I just know that from now on, I resolve to be less of a "Not-Now" mom and more of a "Yes-Now" mom.

Maybe then the girls and I will all become better people and build a much more special bond with each other.

Starting with Now.